Is Everything Alright?

... Shit has done but getting worse and worse with time. my depression has done nothing but getting worse, and pulling myself to even survive one more day has become something i can barely ever manage anymore... 

For the last three weeks i've started aving nightmares again, getting far more frequent, violent and intense. Up to the point of waking up screaming and in shock. Or... worse yet. Spasm hard enough to fall off from bed, but be affected from sleep paralysis. pretty much laying on the floor for a good 5 to 15 minutes.

My family, being as kind and as responsible as they are, if they even happen to come to my room, it's only to complain why i am doing noises or why i have not woken up yet. Even when i am pretty much paralyzed in the floor.

It's these, one of the many moments where i do wish i had someone close to me who gave a single fuck about me..... probably not assuming i am a lazy ass who only does shit to demand for attention would greatly help...

So... This drawing is pretty much my way to somewhat compensate for it. Those who know it better. Beyond all the fiction involving ERI, they were developed as a means to pretty much allow myself to process situations that i could not process by myself ( since it's generally easier for me to process things, and calculate action scenarios with someone who is not me. [the joys of not really having developed a proper sense of self and suffering from constant dehumanization lol] ). So i thought it could also be a good idea to five myself something to do while imagining someone would physically be there for me when i am more in need of.

For those thinking about why i don't use any of my friends or loved ones. Some of them don't like to be involved on these things, the others have a lot of things to worry already and i think that given they are technically away and unreachable, too, it would not make much of a difference to put a character on my own on that situation, either